you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
"Guy Time" translaed into 10 shots apiece and me waking up covered in my own blood.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
He walked into the bar with a pineapple and they served him AND the pineapple
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
