I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
