how hairy? two words: wookie tits
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I said "I am wrapped in the Cocoon Of Comfort! You should go." He started to argue and I yelled "COCOON OF COMFORT!!!" silencing him
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
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