Fine. I'll sleep in my office
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I had to go to the front counter of the restaurant and ask for the key because I was "pretty sure my friend is passed out in the bathroom right now"
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
idk i just feel really unsatisfied. like something's missing from my life... maybe it's chicken nuggets...
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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