His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
It was really weird walking into a CVS and not going straight to the pharmacy for plan B.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
Randomize
