That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
This baby is an asshole
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
Randomize
