it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I've been trying to fall asleep with ice packs covering my vagina for the last hour... Sorry for being vulgar. I'm going to kill myself.
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize