do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
Would you still love me if I had no teeth
Yeah why?
Cuz i woke up this morning and a few are gone
I feel compelled to tell you that I woke up this morning and found an entire corn on the cob in my purse. Ive decided not to question my drunken behavior anymore, and to just accept it as my lifestyle.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
