I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Hi. This might be awkward, but I met you on saturday at about 330 am. I have to admit I don't remember your name, what we talked about, or various details of how I got home. What I do remember is that I was invested enough in getting your number to ask my cab driver for a pen to write it down since my phone was dead. So do you want to meet, soberer, some time?
Hey bro I think you got the wrong number I'm a dude
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
He stopped in the middle of us banging in order to check in for his Southwest flight.
Keep two things coming: nudes and puppy pictures
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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