You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
What do I wear to meet his family/put his dog to sleep? Is there even an appropriate outfit for this occasion?
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
Being a slave to ur dick is exhausting.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
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