That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
You can't say "they have anal bleaching for that" and then just hang up
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
This is my life. Enjoy the view
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I love you, and I just washed my hair in my work sink with handsoap.
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
