I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
She tried to wake me up by touching my dick. I kept pretending to be asleep.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
Randomize
