She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
I'm sorry, but if I hear stories of you getting fingered in the ass, and selling weed, you are not coming to my party.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
