I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
I'm not going to blow you while you look at fish on the internet.
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Hey I didn't mean to be all lemme get with your ex husband.
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
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