I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I'm 25 and she is 19. She wants to practice blowjobs on me because of my stamina. Not only does the GI bill pay for me to go to school I am teaching a freshman blowjob course. I love Texas.
Are you complaining because you're getting too much sex to find the time to masturbate?
Well, when you say it like that it sounds silly.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I don't need no damn man when I have the cock-a-nator 2000.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Of course he’s dumb. He’s got a 9 inch dick! There’s not enough blood in his body for a big dick and a big brain. It’s science
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