i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I wish you got a notification every time someone masturbated to a Facebook picture of you...
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
And for today's main disappontment. I thought I saw a midget with fireworks get on the buss, alas it's a child with cleaning supplies
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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