you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
All I want is dick and wine.
I'm going to the store to get corona, salad, and blunt wraps...
Randomize
