they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
we need blinds so i can safely watch porn during the day
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I'm still not sure if it was intentional, but the chiropractor definitely cradled his balls on my shoulder. He even seemed to adjust the sack for comfort. I think I should be flattered. He is a doctor, after all..
So. How about you can get tequila certified...
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
