you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
Did you high five my face last night?
Yes. Yes I did.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
I think I was judged by a squirrel this morning during the walk...
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
