I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It was her first time with a girl so I put on my tegan and Sara playlist to really get the full experience.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
He kept apologizing that the nerve damage makes him take a while to finish. Meanwhile he gave me 3 orgasms and a leg cramp
Only you could benefit from a reckless driver
Randomize
