I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
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