I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
im taking a nap outside. wake me up in an hour.
way to go to work and not wake me up. when you get home youre rubbing me with aloe and giving me a blowjob. no excuses
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
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