Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
this old dude from the bar is giving me a ride home in a van, his bumper sticker says " don't laugh your kids could be in here" scary world ou here
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
