Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
The vagina on Hilton Head is mighty fine this time of year.
You can't buy drugs with a ziplock bag full of quarters, chuck-e-cheese coins, and a starbucks giftcard.
watch me
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
It took me years of patience and pilates and yoga and flirting to land that penis. So yeah, I’m going to ride it into the sunset and live orgasmically ever after
Randomize
