im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
i need to break up with him. i realized this while i was making a mental grocery list while we were having sex. this is not the first time i've done that.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
$100 bras are my way of telling my boobs that I love and appreciate them, and all the metaphorical doors they have opened for me.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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