There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
WISH UPON A TAMPON
They constantly get farther than me.
tampons.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
I just walked in on Joel doing a buck naked tripod headstand in front of the mirror so he could see the bug bite on his balls
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
Randomize
