nut hugger
i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
currently working on a look that screams, "I'm dead inside, but still trying to enjoy the ride"
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize
