Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
She can't even plan ahead to have toilet paper for her next shit
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
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