Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
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just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
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Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
p.s i need to stop drunk texting my mom. she brings up text convos all the time and i have no idea what shes talking about...