We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Sorry, I was unaware dragging you upstairs for sex was such an awful thing.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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