so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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