just survived the first fart of the relationship.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
not ubering you a puppy
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
i got a dick pic last night and the mother fucker had a Jesus picture in the background.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
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