she reminds me of the kind of girl who'd fuck in church if you asked. I can dig it.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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