He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
she asked me if I wanted a handjob on the haunted mansion ride at Disney. was I suposed to say no?
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
i woke up to you and that girl going out onto the balcony naked
oh sorry man.. we went outside because we DIDN'T want to wake you
i was thinking shit as she was saying it. it was a sarcasm time loop
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
Randomize
