Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
Almost thought it was a good idea to call his parents to thank them for having a son with an awesome dick. That high.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
Randomize
