I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
FYI, announcing your arrival at jail with "Hi,yes, I'm checking in? I believe I've reserved a bed, a 2 night stay this weekend?" is, in fact, frowned upon
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
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