Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
She pulled vodka outta the dryer and told me to drink it
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
Ever been to a strip club with one stripper? I have. And she sucked.
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize
