Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
