Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
So, I had a dream last night that involved you as an actual cloaked Captain America and a lot of weird sex, and I didn't hate it.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
