But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent a solid 3 minutes trying to figure out how to send a smell through my phone
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
It's not safe here. I had urgent and violent diarrhea last night, and I got blackout drunk. Please don't come over.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
He was wearing a diaper to the party. I've never felt like such a creep in my life.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
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