yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
Anyway, my grandfather thinks you're attractive
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
soo how bad was i last night?
licking sour cream off of the table at pancheros bad.
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???