Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
There needs to be a newsfeed for phones... A list of all my drunken calls, texts, BBMs, new contacts, pictures sent AND received, all in chronological order.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
Pretty sure I just had sex with the black kid who grew up in a car from "angels in the outfield"
How come I never meet celebrities?
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
I DEMAND FORESKIN
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Randomize
