is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
Thanks i'm proud of you and I'm proud of beer and vodka for making me drunk
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
