Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
My goal for tonight is to swipe my debit card through those weird rolls on the back of a big bald guy's head.
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
You know how I said I'd never worry about my roommate? Well I just walked in on her masturbating to Star Trek.
Did she boldly cum where no one has cum before?
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...
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