my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
Just shared a bacon biscuit with my cat.... Life is weird for me right now
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
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