I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
A houseboat for a bachelor party is a terrible idea, we nearly die when on dry land, so how the hell are we supposed to survive a 3 day binge on a massive lake?
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
Using a 12 year old as a wingman. Does that make me a bad person?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize