I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
Randomize