doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
Mike is offhisass drunk and just sat down next to my sister and said "If you gained 30 pounds and stopped reading poetry, I would be attracted to you. Now, your little sister, attractive, even though she's basically the same person as you- she just pulls it off better because she's 15."
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize