i may not always bang 16 year olds but when i do, i prefer hot ones
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
To give you an idea, there's a group upstairs trying to break down a door with their fists and heads.
You attempted what you called the "Long Island Heist", in which you shoved a half glass of Long Island down your pants and asked me to help you sneak it out. That drunk.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
So I just got motorboated by my grandma…
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
sooo, that video of you eating lasangna with the strobe going magically reappeared on my phone
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
Randomize
