We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
