i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
WHY IS THERE A GOLD FISH IN MY BONG??
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
